So, technically this could be posted on any of my three blogs (Overkill, I know... LOL). But I think that this should suffice for now.
After four days off, I have a cleaner house, a slightly cleaner mind, and some plans in place for my future.
I won't spoil the surprise, however, as to what I'm doing... that wouldn't be much fun. However, step one was to fix up/spruce up my web page. Please let me know what you think!!
www.monikagraf.com
Friday, March 2, 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
What to do?
It occurs to me lately that I may have lost sight of the big picture. It's a grand statement I hear a lot on television and in referrence to young people's directions in life.
The next question is what to do about it?
But "therein lies the rub!" I suppose that this could be an occasion to make a list of pros and cons. An evaluation of what I have going for me and what needs to change. I guess it could be yet another example of my narcissism and hubris, but even with all I have going for me, I'm still not content.
Question: How does a person find happiness with their current situation or place when they're constantly looking to the horizon for something more? "Stop looking and be happy" is the answer I get fairly often from the wise-types in my life. Stop worrying is another common answer. But above all, I hear "be patient. It'll make more sense when you're older."
I'm gonna call shennanigans on that one... Bullshit. Suck it up and just stop trying?
If something is not right, then something is wrong. True, there are shades of grey in every seemingly black and white case. But, I stand by my statement. If I can't move forward, I get nervous and start to over-analyze my situation. It's a sort of defence mechanism against boredom that I've developed since childhood.
But, it still begs the question. What is it that I should do with my life? a
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Fly fly away
Some days you just want to fly, fly away...
Lou Reed!!!
I'm not saying that I live on the Dirty Boulevard by any means, but I can understand the desire to get away. Not a vacation, but a whole departure from all that is the same old thing and comfortable and familiar. Fly fly away from the world I know and do something completely different.
There are times that I wonder if there is something missing in my heart that might be somewhere else. Its a search for completion that drives me to keep going, keep striving, keep looking for different things and different experiences. Striving for that one illusive something that is just over the horizon, and just out of reach.
Not sure if I'll ever find it, or if this stupid insatiable aspect of my soul will ever be sated or if it will kill me... either that or the grammar police will get me with that last run-on sentence.
Like many other artists, I often find myself in these kinds of situations. The search for that illusive spark or passion. The one that will finally satisfy that itch that makes me so uncomfortable in my own skin. Maybe if I find it, I can start to like myself. Who knows?
Lou Reed!!!
I'm not saying that I live on the Dirty Boulevard by any means, but I can understand the desire to get away. Not a vacation, but a whole departure from all that is the same old thing and comfortable and familiar. Fly fly away from the world I know and do something completely different.
There are times that I wonder if there is something missing in my heart that might be somewhere else. Its a search for completion that drives me to keep going, keep striving, keep looking for different things and different experiences. Striving for that one illusive something that is just over the horizon, and just out of reach.
Not sure if I'll ever find it, or if this stupid insatiable aspect of my soul will ever be sated or if it will kill me... either that or the grammar police will get me with that last run-on sentence.
Like many other artists, I often find myself in these kinds of situations. The search for that illusive spark or passion. The one that will finally satisfy that itch that makes me so uncomfortable in my own skin. Maybe if I find it, I can start to like myself. Who knows?
Saturday, January 21, 2012
To blog or not to blog...
That is the question, isn't it?
Lately it seems that there are more and more things to complain about and less and less things to celebrate. Could be the gloomy weather, and it could be just me. In either case, here's whats up with me:
Working as much and as hard as I can. There is always room for improvement, and being that business isn't as booming as we'd like, I'm not working as much as I'd want.
Health problems with family are always interesting. Dad is the most recent recipient of heart attacks in the family. A stent and a partial blockage later, he's back at home. Needless to say, he's not a fan of his new "heart friendly" diet. No more butter and whole milk... But he can still have garlic, which is good.
Wedding planning is going well, and we have a caterer now! Johnny Carinos is officially doing our catering as of today. I still have to put down a deposit and sign the paperwork, but it looks good. Simple fare for simple people. They were unable to provide a bartender, but I'm optimistic about finding a good one.
Dress construction plans are going well too. I'm going to the gym again, albeit not in any discernible pattern.
So, all things considered, its going pretty well. Now I just need to figure out some sort of routine that I can do around my flexible schedule and try and make some sense out of the chaos. Maybe the key is to keep breathing and just keep chipping away at the things that need to get done.
Slow and steady...
That, and to keep writing. I think that helps too.
Lately it seems that there are more and more things to complain about and less and less things to celebrate. Could be the gloomy weather, and it could be just me. In either case, here's whats up with me:
Working as much and as hard as I can. There is always room for improvement, and being that business isn't as booming as we'd like, I'm not working as much as I'd want.
Health problems with family are always interesting. Dad is the most recent recipient of heart attacks in the family. A stent and a partial blockage later, he's back at home. Needless to say, he's not a fan of his new "heart friendly" diet. No more butter and whole milk... But he can still have garlic, which is good.
Wedding planning is going well, and we have a caterer now! Johnny Carinos is officially doing our catering as of today. I still have to put down a deposit and sign the paperwork, but it looks good. Simple fare for simple people. They were unable to provide a bartender, but I'm optimistic about finding a good one.
Dress construction plans are going well too. I'm going to the gym again, albeit not in any discernible pattern.
So, all things considered, its going pretty well. Now I just need to figure out some sort of routine that I can do around my flexible schedule and try and make some sense out of the chaos. Maybe the key is to keep breathing and just keep chipping away at the things that need to get done.
Slow and steady...
That, and to keep writing. I think that helps too.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year internet!
Every year that goes by is bittersweet, to me at least. There are new faces coming into our lives, and beloved faces leaving them. To look back in regret is something that no one should do, unless you're on a killing spree, then yes... regret the killing part and go turn yourself in. Right now.
Most of us do not look back at the previous year and think "Damn, I really shouldn't have done that" or "Man, I know that was a dumb thing to try". Actually, most of the people I talk to around New years are saying: "This next year I'm going to..." Fill in the blank.
New Year's Resolutions!
They range from anything as trite (and redundant) as losing 5, 10, 50 lbs to endeavoring to buy a small island. But its a goal. A dream, if you will... and I won't begrudge anyone their dreams. I've had the weight loss one so many years in a row that I don't count it as a resolution anymore. I did make one, though.
Don't worry, its not "blog every day" cause we know thats not going to happen.
Actually, I'm going to finish one of my stories and try and get it published. Hell, in this age of digital publishing, I might just do that part myself.
Whether or not anything gets done is not really the relevant part of the resolution. Its more that things are being done in the spirit of self-improvement. Its sort of like what my brother, Thomas always used to say when I was a kid "Shoot for the stars, and even if you never quite make it that far, you'll still be further than if you had never tried at all."
I like that.
Every year that goes by is bittersweet, to me at least. There are new faces coming into our lives, and beloved faces leaving them. To look back in regret is something that no one should do, unless you're on a killing spree, then yes... regret the killing part and go turn yourself in. Right now.
Most of us do not look back at the previous year and think "Damn, I really shouldn't have done that" or "Man, I know that was a dumb thing to try". Actually, most of the people I talk to around New years are saying: "This next year I'm going to..." Fill in the blank.
New Year's Resolutions!
They range from anything as trite (and redundant) as losing 5, 10, 50 lbs to endeavoring to buy a small island. But its a goal. A dream, if you will... and I won't begrudge anyone their dreams. I've had the weight loss one so many years in a row that I don't count it as a resolution anymore. I did make one, though.
Don't worry, its not "blog every day" cause we know thats not going to happen.
Actually, I'm going to finish one of my stories and try and get it published. Hell, in this age of digital publishing, I might just do that part myself.
Whether or not anything gets done is not really the relevant part of the resolution. Its more that things are being done in the spirit of self-improvement. Its sort of like what my brother, Thomas always used to say when I was a kid "Shoot for the stars, and even if you never quite make it that far, you'll still be further than if you had never tried at all."
I like that.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Wine of the day!
Alright! New wine today... :D
Todays wine is Old Vine Red. Lot Number 55, California Red Wine, Bottled by Marietta Cellars.
Smell: Oaky with a light fruit note. Very light and fragrant. Beautiful and simple. Fruity and jammy.
Taste: Wow jamborie goodness! Lovely balance of jammy goodness and light oak finish. I dare say that I could drink the entire bottle in one sitting if I wasn't careful.
Think I've found my new favorite wine, actually... This one is probably better than the Gnarly Head Red Blends or Klinker Brick Old Vine Zins...
Very tasty goodness!
The label on the back says:
"Old Vine REd is a proprietary red wine made to replicate the field blends of many of the old vineyards in Sonoma and Mendocino Counties. Predominantly comprised of Zinfandel, Old Vine Red is characterized by intense spicy aromas, bright fruit, and a solid structure. Since 1978, this wine has been the 'red house pour' in many fine restaurants across the nation."
Woo! That is some good stuff! Okay... I'm doing feeling pretty good now, so I think I'll have some more wine and eat some dinner. Yep yep!
Todays wine is Old Vine Red. Lot Number 55, California Red Wine, Bottled by Marietta Cellars.
Smell: Oaky with a light fruit note. Very light and fragrant. Beautiful and simple. Fruity and jammy.
Taste: Wow jamborie goodness! Lovely balance of jammy goodness and light oak finish. I dare say that I could drink the entire bottle in one sitting if I wasn't careful.
Think I've found my new favorite wine, actually... This one is probably better than the Gnarly Head Red Blends or Klinker Brick Old Vine Zins...
Very tasty goodness!
The label on the back says:
"Old Vine REd is a proprietary red wine made to replicate the field blends of many of the old vineyards in Sonoma and Mendocino Counties. Predominantly comprised of Zinfandel, Old Vine Red is characterized by intense spicy aromas, bright fruit, and a solid structure. Since 1978, this wine has been the 'red house pour' in many fine restaurants across the nation."
Woo! That is some good stuff! Okay... I'm doing feeling pretty good now, so I think I'll have some more wine and eat some dinner. Yep yep!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Wine of the day!
In wedding planning, I've decided that to make it special, I'm going to add a few little special touches instead of going over the top and making it some sort of fete or gala or something else equally ridiculous.
So, I'm going to get some really good wines. Today I went to the local liquor store (Liquor Mart) and picked the brains of the assistant wine manager. I picked up four bottles to start. Tonight, I'm trying the first one.
Oraison, a Cotes-du-Rhone wine from Vin De La Vallee Du Rhone. Made in 2009.
Smells very soft and clean, especially for a red. There is an underlying jam scent with a lilt of spiciness. Its very inviting in its soft scent, which makes the taste an even bigger surprise.
The first sip is very peppery mid-tongue. The scent carries up through the taste a hint of fruit. There is a lingering body throughout my whole mouth. A nice meaty red that has enough complexity to give up a little more flavor with every sip. This is the kind of wine that could hold its own against a serious steak or a heavy Italian dish.
The label says:
"This rich and round Cotes-du-Rhone wine is made from Grenach (80%), Shiraz (10%), and Mourvedre (10%). It is produced on one of the best pebble terroirs of the Rhone valley, where poor soils and strong Mistral wind naturally concentrate the grapes. With flavors of black cherry, thyme and cinnamon, this wine pairs perfectly with cheeses and red and white grilled meat. *In French, Oration means prayer"
I feel like the pepper outweighs the fruit, but after 1/2 of the glass, its a lot easier to taste the black cherry and cinnamon. The thyme is harder to pick up, but it could be what I'm tasting as the pepper note.
Good all around. Would be better with a steak or heavier meal, I think...
Still like Gnarly Head Old Vine Zin better. :D
So, I'm going to get some really good wines. Today I went to the local liquor store (Liquor Mart) and picked the brains of the assistant wine manager. I picked up four bottles to start. Tonight, I'm trying the first one.
Oraison, a Cotes-du-Rhone wine from Vin De La Vallee Du Rhone. Made in 2009.
Smells very soft and clean, especially for a red. There is an underlying jam scent with a lilt of spiciness. Its very inviting in its soft scent, which makes the taste an even bigger surprise.
The first sip is very peppery mid-tongue. The scent carries up through the taste a hint of fruit. There is a lingering body throughout my whole mouth. A nice meaty red that has enough complexity to give up a little more flavor with every sip. This is the kind of wine that could hold its own against a serious steak or a heavy Italian dish.
The label says:
"This rich and round Cotes-du-Rhone wine is made from Grenach (80%), Shiraz (10%), and Mourvedre (10%). It is produced on one of the best pebble terroirs of the Rhone valley, where poor soils and strong Mistral wind naturally concentrate the grapes. With flavors of black cherry, thyme and cinnamon, this wine pairs perfectly with cheeses and red and white grilled meat. *In French, Oration means prayer"
I feel like the pepper outweighs the fruit, but after 1/2 of the glass, its a lot easier to taste the black cherry and cinnamon. The thyme is harder to pick up, but it could be what I'm tasting as the pepper note.
Good all around. Would be better with a steak or heavier meal, I think...
Still like Gnarly Head Old Vine Zin better. :D
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